Warning: DO NOT BLOW DRY IN SLEEP

Product Warnings: Warning on Stroller: "Remove child before folding. "Warning on a curling iron: Do Not Insert Curling Iron Into Any Bodily Orifice…On a box of household nails: CAUTION! - Do NOT swallow nails! May cause irritation! On a tube of Super Glue: Do not use in eyes. Are there that many idiots out there who need this kind of warning? Well....apparently there are. Yesterday I was getting annoyed at my microwave door because the plasic portion below the handle has a crack and hangs below the microwave. In my infinite wisdom I decided to super glue it back to the microwave. Part of the repair required me to glue with the tube pointing up. It wouldn't go up so I shook it. Next thing I know, Super Glue in the eye. I rubbed it quickly as it burned my eye. Now my eye is glued shut. I imagine going to the emergency room and trying to explain my idiocy. It will be featured on Appalachian Emergency Room on Mad TV. Luckily after much work, butter, towels, tongs, knives, spatula's, whisks, and straws I was able to get my eye open and get the glue off my eyelid. I will no longer scoff at the product warning, nor should you, for you might be next to use the blow dryer in the bathtub.