Some of you may know that years ago I would get panic attacks at night for some bizarre reason. I'd wake up in the night and suddenly think of things I needed to do, didn't do, did wrong, why I was a bad Mom, bad wife, bad daughter, why I could be organized like other people, holy crap did I forget to do...yada yada and list never ended. As my worries grew, my heart would start racing and pounding and I'm sure, skipping beats or double beating, which ever and then suddenly, I knew I was having a heart attack. What would Hillary do without me (I didn't have Cayden yet)? Then I would start bawling and my arms would go numb and I knew death was imminent. I would get up and pace the halls making it worse with more worries. Why did I eat that coffee icecream and not repent? When I died and people found my messy house what would they THINK? My Obituary: "Lisa Campbell died in her sleep of horrible diseases. She leaves behind a huge mess that we all have to sort through. Throughout her life she was inconsiderate of who would have to deal with this crap when she was gone. Rest in peace ya lazy jerk". Anyway. I actually went to the ER once over this and they told me it was nothing more than a panic attack and to lighten up for HS (hell sakes).
So to make a long story longer. I developed a method to calm talk myself out of a panic attack when it started and calm myself down and get to sleep. Some people apparently count sheep, I don't know what freak would really do that. I mean really. Using math as a way to go to sleep? Yeah. THAT is how a panic attack for START for me! Anyway as I've told a million people, my tried and true method for getting to sleep, MY way of "counting sheep" as it were is to count money (that doesn't count as money). So, I win the lottery and I win 10 million dollars (must be tax free) and I spend it. Starting with 10 million I work my down. First, I pay tithing because even though I'm winning the lottery and it's technically ill-gotten gains, I'm not taking a chance, I'm paying tithing. Then I pay off all of my bills, then I pay of my Dads bills, then I have this fabulous party for my family. I don't tell anyone I've won. At this fabulous party I pick up all my brothers and sister and their spouses and my parents up one by one each in their own limo which takes them to the private party. In my plans it WAS LaCaille until I read really bad reviews about them now I need a new place in my mind. But until then, I have the garden room reserved with a huge buffet with every fancy thing on it. After the buffet I present everyone with an envelope with equal amounts of money, except my Dad who gets the most so he can retire. My Mom gets her fair shair too. It's usally $500,00 for each sibling and $1,000,000 for my pa. Then I sell my house, buy a new one - nothing enormous, but a rambler on flat ground with a large secluded lot etc. off a busy street. Then I take trips and by the time I get to this point I'm asleep. In fact I rarely get beyond the party before I'm gone.
**Now you're saying, why do I care about this tardo blog? Well you probably don't. But my long long point is about winning the lottery. What? yes, I know, it's way off the topic. We've all gotten those "tell me about yourself " tags or emails and basically they are all the same. Here is mine and it's not the same. I wonder about myself and I wonder if other people are the same as me or if I'm destined for hell. Here is my quiz. Either blog your responses or comment below if you dare. Warning. some of these questions are disturbing:
1. Would you enter the lottery in hopes of winning knowing that it's against church rules? My answer: Yes Would you pay tithing?
2. If you came upon money confiscated in a drug bust would you take some? What do they do with it? No one can take it. They can't give it back. My answer. Yes.
3. If you had a chance for unlimited cash, would you take it knowing the price would be fame? No more privacy etc. Would it be worth it? My answer: No.
4. If your spouse was abusive but still won custody or joint custody would you flee with the child and go underground and hide this child knowing it was against the law? My answer: Yes
5. If your child did something illegal would you turn him/her in to the police? My answer: I don't know. It would depend how serious, how long he/she'd been out of control.
6. Let's say the world was struck by something disasterous and most of the world died and you were one of the living. All of remaining people begin congregating in one area of the US. You go there too, but in finding a place to live, would you find the most elaborate mansion that was far away from everyone else or choose a small house where everyone else lived. My answer: the small house - initially.
7. If you were a german during the nazi occupation, would you willingly hide a jewish person or family knowing it could mean death for your family? My answer: Sadly no. I'm disappointed about this.
8. Part 2 - would you knowingly rat out a jewish family or person if it would mean favor for your family? My answer: no. at least I have some scruples.
9. If you were stranded somewhere or found yourself in a life or death struggle. Would you be able to survive if pure force of will made a difference? My answer: yes. I am a fighter
10. Is there a super off the wall job you think would be fun to do? My answer: Radio DJ for a morning show. Not playing songs, but commentary and being funny.
Ok your turn. Feel free to add questions of your own. Sorry this is really bizarre but these are things I've thought of.
Happy St. Patrick's Day 2026
7 months ago
4 comments:
1. Would you enter the lottery in hopes of winning knowing that it's against church rules? My answer: Yes, but I'm not sure about paying tithing?
2. If you came upon money confiscated in a drug bust would you take some? What do they do with it? No one can take it. They can't give it back. My answer. Yes.
3. If you had a chance for unlimited cash, would you take it knowing the price would be fame? No more privacy etc. Would it be worth it? My answer: No, I don't care for the fame.
4. If your spouse was abusive but still won custody or joint custody would you flee with the child and go underground and hide this child knowing it was against the law? My answer: Yes
5. If your child did something illegal would you turn him/her in to the police? My answer: Dito - I don't know. It would depend how serious, how long he/she'd been out of control.
6. Let's say the world was struck by something disasterous and most of the world died and you were one of the living. All of remaining people begin congregating in one area of the US. You go there too, but in finding a place to live, would you find the most elaborate mansion that was far away from everyone else or choose a small house where everyone else lived. My answer: I'll take whatever is available and work up from there.
7. If you were a german during the nazi occupation, would you willingly hide a jewish person or family knowing it could mean death for your family? My answer: Yes, I would be scared out of my mind but I would do it.
8. Part 2 - would you knowingly rat out a jewish family or person if it would mean favor for your family? My answer: no.
9. If you were stranded somewhere or found yourself in a life or death struggle. Would you be able to survive if pure force of will made a difference? My answer: Yes, I don't know how I would do it but, I would find a way.
10. Is there a super off the wall job you think would be fun to do? My answer: Medical Examiner - do I need to say more?
Lisa, a blog is just that - enter what is on your mind. For National Blog Month you too will see the inside of me! Here are my answers:
1. Would you enter the lottery in hopes of winning knowing that it's against church rules?
Yes. Would you pay tithing? Yes. (I have no lottery issues or scruples)
2. If you came upon money confiscated in a drug bust would you take some? What do they do with it? No one can take it. They can't give it back.
No! With my luck I would somehow be connected with the drugs and be put away. Not worth the risk.
3. If you had a chance for unlimited cash, would you take it knowing the price would be fame? No more privacy etc. Would it be worth it?
No.
4. If your spouse was abusive but still won custody or joint custody would you flee with the child and go underground and hide this child knowing it was against the law?
Yes!
5. If your child did something illegal would you turn him/her in to the police?
If it was a crime against society and doing time/paying fines had to be undertaken to make my child a better person and teach him a lesson than yes, I would turn him/her in, especially if it involved drugs.
6. Let's say the world was struck by something disastrous and most of the world died and you were one of the living. All of remaining people begin congregating in one area of the US. You go there too, but in finding a place to live, would you find the most elaborate mansion that was far away from everyone else or choose a small house where everyone else lived.
I would congregate with the people for support and take whatever.
7. If you were a German during the Nazi occupation, would you willingly hide a Jewish person or family knowing it could mean death for your family?
If it was a family member or person that we loved then yes. If it was an unknown Jewish family then probably not.
8. Part 2 - would you knowingly rat out a Jewish family or person if it would mean favor for your family?
No.
9. If you were stranded somewhere or found yourself in a life or death struggle. Would you be able to survive if pure force of will made a difference?
Probably not.
10. Is there a super off the wall job you think would be fun to do?
Selling contacts? (hee hee)
I swear, Lisa, sometimes you describe me so perfectly. I have those same night thoughts! Sometimes I'll think, "What if so and so died?" - like one of my kids or siblings, and I'll go through everything and bawl or think about bad things that have happened in the past, or how I'm a terrible mother, person etc. It is ridiculous. I've even tried the lottery scenario, but I turn that into a panic attack, too. How much should I give cousins, grandparents, uncles? Are people going to start asking us for money? Will they hate us because they're jealous? Why are they such rude, greedy pigs!! I can't fall asleep to that.
That reminds me of a scenario I used to sleep when I was about 13 (when my insomnia problems began) I imagined that something terrible happened and everyone on earth died, except for me and Jake Wall (the boy I had a crush on). He was then forced to procreate with me. Pretty pathetic scenario, but it got me through the hard times.
ANYWAY, here are my answers:
1. I guess since there is no lottery here in Utah, if I were to enter it somewhere else, it would be like a fluke and I wouldn't feel guilty because "I only did it that once." I would pay my tithing to clear up any excess guilt I felt about it.
2. Drug money seems dirty and wrong. I wouldn't do it.
3. I could not handle any type of fame. I don't even want family pictures of me - there's just no way. The money would not be worth it.
4. I would definitely hide my child from an abusive spouse.
5. Yeah, I agree with everyone about the child and the illegal thing. I guess it depends on how serious the offense was. If they shoplifted, yes. Hurt someone, yes. I can't think of a no scenario. Maybe that means I would.
6. My dream come true is to live away from everyone, so I think I would definitely choose the mansion. I guess if I needed help, though, like getting food and medical attention....maybe I'd have to live around people. Poo.
7. I don't know about hiding another family - I would like to do it on principle, but I would really hate living with other people. It would be awkward. The threat of death would not rule me,it's just that I want to be the schlub I am only in front of my own family.
8. I would not rat anyone out.
9. I think I would be able to survive. I always have to keep going until something's completely finished.
10. My off-the-wall job would be a Court TV reporter. Beth Karas or Lisa Bloom, specifically. I want to be them.
1. Would you enter the lottery in hopes of winning knowing that it's against church rules? Yes
2. If you came upon money confiscated in a drug bust would you take some? What do they do with it? No one can take it. They can't give it back. Yes.
3. If you had a chance for unlimited cash, would you take it knowing the price would be fame? No more privacy etc. Would it be worth it? My answer: Yes, if its truly unlimited. You can buy a goodly amount of privacy. I'm thinking an island.
4. If your spouse was abusive but still won custody or joint custody would you flee with the child and go underground and hide this child knowing it was against the law? Yes, for a little while, until I become abusive. My kids incite abuse in otherwise normal people.
5. If your child did something illegal would you turn him/her in to the police? My answer: Yes.
6. Let's say the world was struck by something disasterous and most of the world died and you were one of the living. All of remaining people begin congregating in one area of the US. You go there too, but in finding a place to live, would you find the most elaborate mansion that was far away from everyone else or choose a small house where everyone else lived. Only two choices? That doesnt seem very much like any city I've been in. Oh well. The big one, but I'd make a lot of friends in the small houses, so they kept me updated.
7. If you were a german during the nazi occupation, would you willingly hide a jewish person or family knowing it could mean death for your family? yeah. Youre going to die someday, and you dont want that familys blood on your hands. Plus it just feels right.
8. Part 2 - would you knowingly rat out a jewish family or person if it would mean favor for your family? No. See my previous answer.
9. If you were stranded somewhere or found yourself in a life or death struggle. Would you be able to survive if pure force of will made a difference? My answer: Gay question
10. Is there a super off the wall job you think would be fun to do? My answer: Radio DJ for a morning show. Not playing songs, but commentary and being funny. Party Stripper. Ive been practicing for years.
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